A SPACE ALIEN RAPED MY ELECTRIC BROOM

by Karl Bova
Puerto Vallarta, Mexico

A Mexican gardener is living in fear because the space alien that beat him to a pulp and tried to mate with his weed eater returned to his house--and raped his electric broom.

"I'll have no peace until that creature is dead," Oscar Diaz, 47, told newsmen. "I still can't figure out why he's torturing me.

"If he wants to mate with tools and appliances he ought to go to a hardware store."

The gardener's ordeal began when a bullet-shaped UFO appeared directly in front of his truck on an isolated dirt road last July.

As The NEWS reported at the time, Diaz swerved to avoid a collision and skidded into a field.

He was still behind the wheel when an extraterrestrial with glassy eyes, reptile-like face and unusually long arms approached his truck.

The creature allegedly dragged Diaz out of the cab, beat him up-- then tried to mate with the weed eater he carried in the back of his truck.

"I thought I'd seen the last of him until somebody ransacked my house while I was at work on march 5," said the bewildered gardener.

"The next morning I heard gasping and grunting noises coming from my closet and when I opened the door I found the alien on top of my electric broom.

"He beat me up badly the last time we had a run-in so I didn't interfere. I ran out of the house and called the police on a neighbor's phone."

"But by the time they arrived the alien was gone and my electric broom was twisted like a corkscrew."

"I know it was the same space alien," he added. "You never forget a face like that."

...

[Police say they haven't confirmed this story, but Dias "has nothing to gain by lying."]

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