Math Mayhem

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Mathematical Limericks

Who says there's no poetry in mathematics. Consider this equation:

This equation translates to:

Integral z-squared dz
From 1 to the cube root of 3
Times the cosine
Of three pi over 9
Equals log of the cube root of e.
Before you send me critical emails, I already know that the "log" is "natural log" or "log to the base e". This limerick apparently dates from that period in history when physicists understood the convention that "log" without qualification meant "natural log" and that if any other kind of log was meant, you had to specify its base explicitly in the notation.

The next equation limerick is easier. It was devised by Leigh Mercer (1893-1977), and appeared in Word Ways, 13, 1, (Feb, 1980), p. 36. Mercer also devised one of the most famous palindromes: "A man, a plan, a canal—Panama." Mercer's biography can be found in Word Ways, 24, 3. (August 1991), p. 131-138. He was a London panhandler who drew caricatures on sidewalks for donations.

Translation:

A dozen a gross and a score,
Plus three times the square root of four,
Divided by seven
Plus five times eleven
Is nine squared and not a bit more.

I suppose we should include here Mercer's example of how to make a limerick from a number, 1,264,853,971.2758463, or vice versa.

One thousand two hundred and sixty
four million eight hundred and fifty
three thousand nine hun-
dred and seventy one
point two seven five eight four six three.

Here's another limerick equation:

Translation:

Richard Wells, who sent me this, says "I thought about making the last line scan a little better, but then realized that it's actually much funnier the way it is, as if the speaker is hurriedly trying to correct the sign problem by finding some way to make "-1" rhyme with "y" and "pi"."

A Möbius stripper.
Cover of Science Askew
by Donald Simanek and John Holden.
Replição, 2004.
Here's some classic math limericks.

A mathematician confided
That a Möbius strip is one-sided.
You'll get quite a laugh
If you cut it in half.
For it stays in one piece when divided.

A burlycue dancer, a pip
Named Virginia could peel in a zip;
But she read science fiction
And died of constriction
Attempting a Möbius strip.
—Cyril Kornbluth (1923-1958) U.S. Writer

Here's two original mathematical limericks by Donald E. Simanek.

Null vectors have zero projection.
So you ask, "What can be their direction?"
They point any which way.
"That's magic!" you say?
Not really; it's just misdirection.

The Professor said, "Now I'll tell you
A fact known to only a few
Men and women alive.
Two plus two equals five!
For large enough values of two."

Finally, Martin Gardner contributes this one to our collection.

The Unending Mystery of p

p goes on and on and on,
And e is just as cursed.
I wonder, "How does p begin
When its digits are reversed?"


¹ f(x)

This x is a very independent variable.
Fuzzy Logic

Any variable x which refuses to be dependent on any y is is about as "independent" as it can be.


Base deception

A problem in number base conversions: Prove that Christmas = Halloween = Thanksgiving.

Proof:

Certain impressionable minds might assume from this remarkable exercise in number-base conversions that there is some mystical significance relating the dates of these holidays.

One-liners.

Amoebas make poor mathematicians; they divide to multiply.

Q. What do you get when you cross an anopheles mosquito with a mountain climber?
A: Nothing: you can't cross a vector with a scaler.
Since a homonym is involved, this works only as a spoken joke.


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